Teaching Moments

The other day Kaylie came home from school telling me about her friend whom she envies. Apparently this friend's parents give her everything that she wants when she wants it, and Kaylie made the comment that her friend's dad must be a very good dad, and when I pointed out that she also had an AMAZING dad, Kaylie said, "Well, he doesn't give me everything I want." The hair on the back of my neck immediately stood up as I was quite disturbed by my sweet daughter implying that Jeremy wasn't a good dad, since he is the best dad I've ever seen, and I was very defensive to her naive comment. I quickly realized that these are the moments that are key to teaching life lessons, and I began my rebuttal of why Jeremy is a great dad and why Kaylie should be grateful to have him and why we don't always give her everything she ever wants when she wants it. I began by telling her that because we love her we have to do what is best for her and that may contradict the things she's asking us for - for instance, when she wants french fries while we're in town but dinner is in an hour, we're not going to buy them for her. This of course makes sense to other parents; it is our job to see the big picture, and more than what they are asking us for that moment. I went on to say that sometimes we don't explain why or how we make the decisions we do for her, and that as our child she doesn't need to know, but needs to be confidant in knowing that because we so deeply love her we are making the best decisions we can for her. Then, because we have been discussing answered prayers with her, I went on to liken our relationship with her to the relationship we have with God. That's when I think I started learning the lesson as well - you know those ah-ha moments where things suddenly get very clear?!

God doesn't always give us what we want when we want it! Ouch. I know that we can become defiant because, of course, we think we know what we need - or at least what we want, and I mean really . . . "If He were a good God . . . then he would give me this, or wouldn't give me that," as it were. I say we, because I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one who has ever had that thought process! Fortunately, He IS a good God, as well as a good Father, and it is His job to see the big picture. To give us the things that we really need, and make us do the things we don't always want to do but are good for us. (I mean, how many times did I refuse to practice piano as a kid - but now how I wish that I could sit down and play!) And furthermore, he reserves the right not to have to explain His decisions to us. It is our turn to rest in the confidence, like Kaylie should with Jeremy and me, that God so deeply loves us that He is making the perfect decisions for us.

I am grateful to know that, while Jeremy and I will make mistakes in attempting to do the very best job we can out of love for our kids, thankfully, God will not, and His plans for us are Perfect and Good, even when through our eyes they don't seem to be.


"For I know the plans I have for you, says the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."